Class Selection

My major struggle with class selection: Next semester starts my senior year. I only have two more semesters at university and that is more than slightly terrifying. At the beginning there is all this open opportunity, but now everything has gotten much more narrow. All of a sudden there is so much I feel like I could have done and only a small amount of things I can do. I want to make this a good year, but I'm on the fence about how to do that. Honestly, the biggest thorn in my side is the science requirement. My whole schedule would be great without that mystery class looming over it

It's not that I dislike science - I think it is a great field and there are lots of people who can benefit from the advances in math and science, and they are a great vehicle towards seeing the world in new and exciting ways. But as someone who has only a casual interest, I have about zero interest in studying it at a college level. I would much rather be taking a language class, or writing essays about Shakespeare than solve equations. I think the problem with Brandeis is that the sciences are all at such a high and utterly demanding level that someone who isn’t a major in those fields can feel lost. I have tried to take 3 different classes that would have satisfied this requirement and I have had to drop all of them because I was going to fail. I don't have the time or the energy to put into classes that are so high over my head, and it makes me sad that I cannot investigate everything that I want to do.

Next year I'm going to have to put a lot of focus on my thesis, so I'm not sure I'll have time to dedicate to an extra class on a subject I'm not sure if I'll even be able to do. The other option is to do extended credit and take a science class over the summer, but it would feel crushing for me to not graduate with all of the great friends I have made in my year. I'm also trying to seriously consider grad schools, and if I don't have that degree they're probably not going to want me. That said, the program that I am looking into most is also at Brandeis, and I think they will be understanding if I have to go through with the extended credit. It's a decision that is very much weighing on me, the contemplation of my future. In the meantime, I think the best thing for me to do is focus on the short term - I have an exam on Monday and my Semantics take-home midterm is due next Thursday. Unfortunately, tests don't take themselves.

note-taking

I'm curious about the way that other people take notes. Mine vary by class, but some classes I mix it up. For example, my Semantics Professor puts all of our handouts online, so in that class I print out the handouts into OneNote, where I then use my surface and surface pen to make notes directly on the handout and on the side part of the OneNote page with rule lines on it. This works fairly well, with exception of when the professor hands out something that has not been posted on the online forum we use. In my Creative Nonfiction class, I make notes in my writing journal, and for my independent study I keep it almost entirely on my OneNote, with the exception of sometimes writing in a translation journal when I feel like doing something on paper.

My class that gives me the biggest issues is my Classical Mythology class. I simply cannot every decide how I want to take notes. The Professor talks very fast, And everything he says is interesting, and his slides are wall of text and I sometimes have no clue how on earth to keep up. What seems to work best is for me to Just write down phrases he says, and then look at the slides after class, but the sheer amount of information to learn can be overwhelming. I have a great advantage in that I have lots of knowledge about Mythology (Greek and Celtic in particular) but I still struggle at times, so I cannot imagine how it would be for someone with no Mythological background. The Professor is great though, and I'm glad I'm in this class, challenging as it may since I enjoy the material immensely.

Cheers,
Talia

Imposter Syndrome

I think I did terribly on my last Semantics assignment. Granted, I feel that whenever I turn in any assignment it's terrible (Imposter Syndrome anyone?) but I'm actually pretty scared for the outcome. You see, the problem is that I understood the assignment and what all the questions were asking. Not to mention that I think I came up with satisfactory answers and stated them well. 

So obviously I'm going to fail the assignment. 

Yes, I know that what I said makes no sense, and no that does not change my mind.  

This is the thing about living with anxiety. No matter how well I am doing I constantly wait for something to screw up, because of course then it will and I will be sad and miserable and wail that I brought this upon myself. (I'm a drama queen, just go with it)* To be fair, the whole point of saying this is that I do bring these things on myself. If one expects to fail, they probably will. If I keep worrying about things, I'll never get anything done. Hence, I just submitted my homework and went along on my merry business. Voice in the back of my head is still saying I'm going to fail, but I'm not going to worry about it. As Newt Scamander helpfully points out "Worrying means suffering twice." 

Cheers, 

Talia 

PS check out this proof I made for the assignment, I'm kind of excited that I was able to finally understand my class work:

End of Translation

From Jacques Lezra's End of Translation: "The question of how humanists  make the case for the value of  their disciplines to others […] is a  matter, it is understood, of  translation." Translation and politics are intimately linked in the view of this paper and he notes that translation is a "master term" when discussing the understanding of the Humanities and their current state, and the place they hold in a society in which they are dwindling.

I am a Comparative Literature major, and our program is very small. In addition to the fact that the humanities are dwindling, we have a firm requirement of taking upper level courses in a language other than English. This tends to scare people away from the program, which is unfortunate because it is a great one (I'll admit, I'm biased as the Undergraduate Departmental Representative of the major!)

As someone who is very passionate about language, culture and communication I am always startled when I come across people who aren't because to me language is one of, if not the most essential ways that we communicate with one another and I believe that we should be encouraging multilingualism because with different languages come different ways of thinking, and everyone can benefit from that. I'm not saying that language learning is something that everyone needs to do (I know that for some people it is an impossibility) but rather that widening our gazes into other ways of life is essential towards looking at each other deeply and complexly, and being multilingual can help with that.

At the very least, I believe that one should study other cultures and traditions, even if only from a monolingual standpoint, in order to gain a mutual understanding with others on this earth. In the wake of this, translation, in all its complexity, is made even more necessary. Not only do we have to translate the words, but sometimes even concepts.

People sometimes argue nature vs. nurture. Whatever one might believe, it is undoubtable that where we grow affects how we do so. There is no denying there is inequality in this world, and as my Mythology Professor pointed said the other day in class - despite what we tell our children not everyone can do everything they set out to in life, and many people are born into this world who are at a crippling disadvantage. Some crosses are too hard to bear. Looking at the world like this can be bleak, but it is a reality. And I seriously doubt that we can ever fully grasp the realities of others without humanities and without translation. 

In the same essay referenced before, End of Translation, Lezra speaks about rights and asks whether they are "translatable across cultures, languages, races, religions  in the name, or under the aegis, of a purportedly universal  standard which is also a universal  translating machine: 'Human'  rights?" This is a startling question, and one I cannot possibly answer in a blog post. I will leave you with this question and encourage you to read the essay in full. (Linked below)

I hope that readers of this blog enjoy my musings, because while I'll write them anyway, it's fun to see what other people think.

Cheers,
Talia

Jacques Lezra, End of Translation: https://humanitiesfutures.org/papers/end-of-translation/

Tests

I just finished my placement test to ascertain my academic level in Spanish for when I go to Middlebury this summer. I've been accepted to go to the 7-week Spanish program at Middlebury Language Schools. (More information below) I'm not sure how I did, because there were a lot of questions having to do with Ser/Estar and also the subjunctive, which are things I'm a bit shaky on.

I am fairly fluent when reading Spanish, but when it comes to minute details in grammar I am sorely lacking. This is not to say that I don't understand or can't create the verb forms; I'm just not always completely grammatically correct when I say them. People can understand me when I speak Spanish, and I can understand them, but I have slight issues with grammar. A comparable English mistake would be mispronunciation or "I were going to the store" or "I go to class yesterday." 

Going to Middlebury is going to be a great way to improve my Spanish, and I am very much looking forward to it. I enjoy translating and I know for certain that the more proficient I become in Spanish the better those translations will be. I often have to look up a word or two in a dictionary while working on a translation project, but that could also be linked to the fact that I am translating out of 17th century early modern Spanish and that is not easy for many people, let alone someone like me who is not fully fluent. I intend for these translations to be my thesis project, so it is important that I get them right so that once I have finished my work. Poetry in translation is immensely difficult, but I believe it to be worthwhile.

Cheers,
Talia


Information on the Middlebury Language Schools: http://www.middlebury.edu/ls

Bellerophon

On Thursday our topic in Classical Mythology was Bellerophon.

Bellerophon was one of the Heroes of Ancient Greek myth, and his story is particularly important because it covers what happens to him after all of his trials are over and he settles down into his life post-heroic deeds.

To give you some back story on Bellerophon, we first have to clarify that he was the one with the Pegasus. This is going to be a multiple choice question on the test and if we select Perseus instead we will get marked wrong. The pained look on my Professor's face when Heracles was mentioned was slightly hilarious and he adamantly told us he would not be making him an option.*

Moving forward, Bellerophon is actually really interesting. Reportedly, an ancient hero equal at some points in Greek history to Perseus and Cadmus, he was the classic hero type: kills the monster and gets the princess.

If you are interested in more details about Bellerophon, here are a few of my class notes, but feel free to skip them:

Bellerophon in Homer

• In Illiad 6, the Trojan ally Glaukos meets Diomedes on the field
• Glaukos' ancestor Bellerophon lived in Argos
• The king Proetus hated him because of his wife
• Anteia wanted to have sex with Bellerophon, but he wouldn't
• Proetus sent Bellerophon to Lykia with a sealed message to give to the king who was Anteia's father Iobates
• The message said to kill him

Potiphar's Wife

• Potiphar's Wife Motif: the adulterous wife who turns on her desired lover
• Genesis 39-40
• Joseph, sold into slavery, was purchased by an Egyptian officer named Potiphar
• Potiphar made him overseer of the house
• His wife asked him to sleep with her, but he refused
• She told Potiphar that Joseph tried to rape her
• Joseph ended up in prison where his dream interpretations attracted the attentions of the Pharaoh

Bellerophon's Deeds

• Iobates cannot kill Bellerophon because of their guest-host relationship, so he sent Bellerophon on one-way missions
• to kill the Chimaera
• to fight the Solymoi
• to battle the Amazons
• He set an ambush for him, but Bellerophon defeated the best men
• Iobates had him marry his daughter and rule with him in Lykia
• According to Homer, Bellerophon fell out of favor with the gods for no specified reason

Eventually, Bellerophon tries to ride the Pegasus up to Mt. Olympus to become a god, but this is reaching to far so the Pegasus betrays him and Zeus strikes him down with a lightning bolt.

I enjoy the tale of Bellerophon for many reasons, but primarily because of the two questions I feel it raises most clearly:

1. What does it mean to "reach too far"?
2. What happens to the hero after the fight is over?

As for the first, in class my Professor stated something along the lines of: "What is the line between telling people that they can 'be whatever they want to be' (which is a lie) and 'stay in your lane'?" This is a super interesting question for me, because there is undoubtedly a line there, and one that is particularly precarious, especially when raising children.~

It brings me back to Harry Potter, among other things. Take Voldemort for example. He was so obsessed with becoming immortal that he dies at the mere age of 71, where if he had simply lived the long life that wizards tend to get then he would have made it into his hundreds.

To stop and think through our actions and their affects can be difficult for people, and thinking that we can help ourselves and others to rise up in the world can sometimes be our downfall. It's an important lesson, and one that I value. It is also a lesson that I learned from Bellerophon, when reading the myths as a kid. So this story is important to me in that way, and also in the sense of the second question I have.

Stories tend to end right after the battle ends, after the lovers admit their true love to one another, as a family is miraculously reunited and so forth. But what happens to the heroes after the battles are over, they attain their desired lover, etc.? They get their happily ever after, but what does that mean? If you have read/seen Harry Potter and the Cursed Child you know that according to the play, Harry settles into middle age and not super successfully raising his kids. And with Bellerophon we see that he gets bored and causes trouble, leading to his death.

My Professor brought up the stereotypical rules that many (myself included) are told to play: Primary School, Secondary School, then the optional sets of College, Grad School, Employment, Marriage, Kids, Retirement - then what? What is there to do once you have crossed the benchmarks of life?

Now these things are by no means necessary. Many people that I know have either rejected this path, or done it out of order, or intend not to follow it at all. But in the end, whatever benchmarks we set for ourselves, there is an after.° And I think that the prospect of this is terrifying, because although the sense of relaxation can be good, there is that saying that 'Idle hands are the devil's workshop.' When it is all said and done, I don't know why Bellerophon wanted to be immortal, because honestly an eternity of boredom is what I would expect. Then again, I'm a bit of a pessimist.

Cheers,
Talia

*Apologizes to the Disney fans but that movie was so inaccurate that a drinking game could give you alcohol poisoning.

~Which I'm not, but I have lots of younger cousins.

°Unless we die, but I'm trying to stay positive here.

Creative Nonfiction

It is certainly not the case that I don't like to, or don't want to write. For as long as I can remember, writing has been one of my most favorite things in the world. I think my problem is that I do not fully know what it is I want to write about.

Another problem is that I need time to fully grasp and anchor myself to an idea. Starting in on a writing project, I need to write two or three essays before I can go back and revise even the first one because I need the distance from the piece in order to see what I want from it and what it wants from me. Of course, sometimes that distance grows too far and I can no longer relate to the person I was when I wrote it. The beauty of it all is that these are still my words, and they can be adapted if I simply look at it as something to reflect on - that something being my somewhat flawed past.

What I am talking around is my struggle to write meaningful work in writing workshops. This (Creative Nonfiction) is the fourth writing workshop I have taken, and it is certainly more draining than the workshops I have taken before. I suppose it is because I find difficulty in writing about myself* since my life is a personal one that feels uncomfortable when exposed. That is precisely why I want to stay in this class however, because it pushes me to my limits and past them. If I only do the things that are comfortable in my life I won't grow at all.

Cheers,
Talia

*Trust me, I understand the irony of this being a personal blog post.

Classical Mythology

Wednesdays I only have one class, and that is Classical Mythology. It is one of my favorite classes that I have ever taken because Mythology is something that I have been interested in from a young age. While Mythology is not something I intend to study in depth in the future, it is a subject that I find fascinating because of the ways that we can see into not only the past, but how these things reflect in our modern-day lives.

It's both exciting and annoying that Crash Course just started a new series on Mythology and once again I am astonished by the fact that for a third time Crash Course has announced a series having to do with a class that I have either recently finished, or will finish before the series is over.

It's funny because it’s one of those things where as soon as you hear about something you see it everywhere. Like when I found out what a jeep wrangler looked like and all of a sudden I could see them everywhere.

Then again, maybe they were just popular that year.

Cheers,

Talia

What is Myth? Crash Course Mythology #1